Are we telling this to ourselves to make the pain less, or is it because we don’t want to dig deep and grieve over the fact that something didn’t work out? What if I did believe this was meant to be? What happened when that belief burst like a bubble?

A Chance Encounter:

2.5 years ago, I stumbled upon someone unexpectedly. With no high expectations and no thought of the possibility of becoming friends, it began innocently. Most of the time, our conversations were funny, and I thought, “This won’t last long.” Despite enjoying company, I find it challenging to sustain relationships lacking depth.

The Innocent Beginning:

It all started innocently; I believe that’s where all stories begin. Our conversations were mostly funny, and I thought it wouldn’t last. While I enjoy companionship, the absence of depth makes it difficult for me to keep it going. Despite earlier attempts to delve deeper, I initially encountered communicated boundaries. However, I also experienced a surprising openness and discovered common ground in areas I hadn’t thought possible.

From Laughter to Sustainability:

Although humor was the driving force, it gradually evolved into something sustainable. It’s refreshing to share laughter with someone, but engaging in controversial conversations adds depth. This continued for a while, and somehow, I thought it wouldn’t last. Eventually, he would get bored and seek happiness elsewhere. If I left the country, the contact would be minimal to none. But that didn’t happen; the contact only grew closer and closer, lasting for 2.5 years until a few months ago.

Abrupt Endings:

Then, an abrupt end came. I can tell you it was painful – excruciatingly painful, and it still is. People often say, “It’s not meant to be.” But I disagree.

Embracing the Pain:

Instead of avoiding the pain, I choose to embrace it. Perhaps it was meant to be a painful experience, a lesson, or a turning point in my life. Maybe the belief that it was meant to be was not about a forever connection but about the impact it had on me.

Learning and Growing:

Through this relationship, I learned to appreciate the beauty in connections, even if they are ephemeral. The pain is a testament to the depth of the bond we shared. It’s a reminder of the joy, laughter, and controversial conversations that made the connection unique.

Conclusion:

In the grand tapestry of life, some threads are woven into our existence for a specific purpose, even if that purpose is not everlasting. So, despite the pain, I hold onto the belief that it was meant to be, not as a dismissal of the present pain, but as an acknowledgment of the impact it had on shaping my journey.

Yours,

Tati